Sugar

It came as a thought, a flicker,

It gave me quite a kicker, these words, these colors in my head that swirl every time I close my eyes. Blue, red, yellow and brown, brown always comes last. Brown settles the score, reminding me who’s boss.

Would you…

I wonder, would you spare a moment, during halftime, to look my way?

Would you spend a moment, a fleeting second to push back your stool, tell your boys, “I’m done,” and never drown your joys in a brown bottle? Whisky, Scotch, Red Label…

To see the King I see, would you let go of the slave you embrace, in the name of status?

To see the Eagle I see, would you push aside the thorns, you call friends and embrace the path without light?

My guy, you guy…

Would you…

I wonder, sugar, as sweet and soluble as you are, you bruise and move on, “mwanaume ni kujichocha,” you laugh, but your smile does not light up in your eyes.

Go and get that car, like the one Jaymo has,

Go and get that 40 inch Samsung TV, like the one, Chris has,

While you’re at it, go and get more stuff, to drown who you are, “babe, kwani why are you talking like that?” 

I wonder, sugar, you dissolve in stuff, sweetening tastes for others, losing yourself with every stir.

I got my sugar, but it’s not my taste.

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